~ ALABASTER JARS~

FAITH AND THE WILL OF GOD

You are disappointed with God? I understand that. I have been there...but I think it just may be possible that God is trying to show you something we are man/woman of faith, when we are in these types of waters we need to keep our focus directed on Jesus and not redirect on the problem that we face.

It is the easiest thing in the world to become a piece of drift wood and get off course just a bit when we are following The Lord...I have done it many times...but God is so rich in Mercy that He leads us back We are people whose flesh always lean toward "Works"...and God wants us to understand that it's all of His Grace, perhaps you have tried so hard to have faith that you have more faith in your faith than you have faith in God. Sometimes we strive so hard to believe and when we pray for the sick we tend to have "More Faith" in 'Our Faith" for them to be healed than we "Have Faith" in The Lord Who is a Healer!

~It's called striving~

You see faith that is real....RESTS!

It rests in the finished work of the Cross...and the One who died on that Cross... knowing that HE did everything that will ever be necessary for people to be saved healed delivered and restored...and being content to leave the working out
of all that to HIM knowing that HE is faithful though we never see an answer our faith is not shaken because it's in HIM not in the answer to our prayers

Well I am going to say something you might have never heard before, Faith can be lust. Remember that the Lord said "you have not because you ask not and you ask and don't receive because you ask amiss that you may consume it on your lusts"?

Lust is wanting what you want...how you want it...and when you want it...and it doesn't leave room for The Will Of God...remember He said that HIS ways are not our ways? We can want something that is perfectly good something that is even HIS WRITTEN WILL and HIS WRITTEN Word, yet be totally out of HIS WILL. Jesus said that if we ask ANYTHING according to HIS WILL HE hears us and we receive what we asked for and .that's the Truth "On Trial" your Faith "On Trial". It is not up to us to decide what HIS Will is in any given situation that is when we have to get "THE MIND OF CHRIST" and be able to receive the revelation of the Spirit of the Living God in that situation we face.

You see God really has "TWO WILLS" one is "HIS WRITTEN WILL"

"THE BIBLE" and the other is "HIS REVEALED WILL"

Every Word of God is truth...and every Word of God IS His will....but He also has a specific will for every situation that may even sometimes sound contrary to His written will...and we need to have a revelation of His specific will for every situation

Let me share a story from my own life...that illustrates what I am trying to say here.....

You know that I was married....well he left nearly three years ago for another woman....I was devastated...I had fought for EIGHT years to keep that marriage....and I do mean fought....John left the first time after we were married only a year ...and he was gone for nearly three years....God WANTED to end it then....He has shown me that it was an "Unholy Alliance"....but I was convinced that God would heal it...I mean after all God hates divorce right?.... well I bound God to His Word....I insisted that the Lord had to bring him back....I left no room for the Lord's will...and He told me after that I had prayed "witchcraft prayers" to control Him...I used the Word of God to control Him....and He was bound by His own Word and couldn't do what He WANTED to do

He had wanted to set me free the FIRST time John left ...but I bound God to His own laws....I took away His will....and left the place of Grace and returned to the Law....anyway after John left the Lord began to tell me to lay him and my marriage on the altar...I told the Lord "that's my HOPE"...I thought it was all over for me. I was bound by the Law to this man...and when he left he took my hope with him...my last chance...for a future...for marriage...for love

God said "give ME your hope"...I told Him "I cant because if I give YOU my hope
I don't know what you will do with it"....He told me "this isn't about you and John... this is about you trusting ME"....

Well that began a journey of 7 months of wrestling with God....He called me "Jacob" that whole 7 months (He still does and gave me a hip that comes out of joint to remind me)...and in that time I would say "John did this or John did that"...and He would say "I am not dealing with John. I am dealing with YOU"....and He would show me my heart....the blackness of what was in it.....it would take me hours and hours to share all He taught me in those months....part of it is the teaching on "Forgiving the Debt" that you read....

Anyway by the time seven months had passed I was at the place where God had so exposed my heart that I told Him one day "you know Lord. I don't think I blame John for leaving me"...that's how thoroughly He dealt with my heart...but I was in a LOT of emotional pain...right up till the end....after God dealt with me. and boy I was cut down....talk about death...I was about as dead as you could get....I wondered if God would leave me anything ...of course His goal was to totally kill me and leave HIS Life....

Well at the end of Seven months....one day He came to me. When God talks to me we have conversations. He asks me hard questions and I ask Him to explain things like two friends having a discussion except that for Him its always to show me my heart or something about His ways well He was about to ask me one of the hardest questions He had ever asked you see He was trying to get at the root issue of my life....my need to be loved my need for attention. He still is but I am further down the road than I was, I'm nearly there

Well this day He came into my living room and He said....for the thousandth time
"Lorraine...lay John and your marriage on the altar". I wept and wailed I was in agony I said "I cant Lord, I cant". He showed me a vision of Abraham and Isaac
and He said "Abraham took the thing he loved most and put it on the altar
When he laid Isaac on that altar he didn't know for sure if I would give him back or consume the sacrifice....but he took the thing he loved the most and he worshipped Me"...He said "Lorraine put John on the altar and worship Me" I wept and wailed
"I cant Lord, I cant"

Then He showed me another vision of Mary Magdalene weeping at His feet and breaking the Alabaster Jar over Him....and He said "That oil was the most precious thing she had but she broke it over Me and worshipped Me" and He said "Lorraine your marriage is your alabaster jar...break it over Me and worship Me"....and I wept and wailed "I cant Lord, I cant"....and then He asked the hard question..."Lorraine" why can't you?" And I replied "I made a vow" He said "What vow did you make Lorraine?" I said "till death do us part"

And there was silence in heaven for about 2 minutes...and then He said... "Lorraine"..." IT'S DEAD"! "From now on call yourself a widow"

And in one second He broke that thing off me and set me FREE....free from the Law that I had bound Him to...and free from the pain of it...and the regret...because you see when we know the TRUTH we are set free...well then He poured HIS love for John into my heart not romantic love, love for His soul and then I said "but Lord what will I do now with this empty place? "THE said "The Lord God Himself has prepared a Lamb". You see in the story of Abraham and Isaac, the Lamb was the thing that was to take the place of what was sacrificed like Jesus took our place on the Tree. The thing sacrificed was John...in exchange I received a more intimate knowledge of the "Lamb of God" then I had ever known before and a place of power with Him greater than I had ever known...and a filling of His love and Presence like I had never known...and another thing the "Lamb". He told me "there is another marriage this time it is the right one because I have chosen this one for you" somewhere God is preparing a "Lamb" to take the place of the one sacrificed on the altar of incense.

I said all that to show you how God works to get us to lay down control of things and give it to HIM. Abraham got Isaac back I didn't get John back. but one thing is true, if you give it to God He will do what is right and good and His plans for us will be fulfilled and HIS WILL is done, HIS REVEALED WILL.

GOD showed me something when I grasp a hold of things I hold them with a closed fist and He said "it takes all your strength and all my power to wrestle that thing out of your hand". Then He showed me how He wanted it to be and I saw everything in my life and they were in my hand. But my hand was open and every once in a while God would reach down and take something out of my hand and there would be no struggle because I wasn't grasping it tightly anymore. The amazing thing is that more often than that HE put something IN my hand and it was easy to do because my hand was open. He showed me something else also, when I was resting in HIS hand it was very easy for Him to guide me when I rested my life in HIS hand and did everything from that place of rest in HIM work, ministry, playing with my grandkids, praying etc. All He had to do was tip His hand just a little bit this way or that way and I would go in that direction. HE would tip it ever so slightly again and I would go in that direction no struggle but when I fought Him strived worried then we went back to the same place as we were when MY hand was grasping, "STRESSED OUT," except this time HE had to GRASP me and He said "here we are again it is taking all your strength and all of my power to keep you in My hand"

So you see whether you are grasping to hang on to things, or striving and fighting HIM, the battle is the same everything you and He have goes to the battle there is nothing left for the advance and you can be in that place for years and years and never get anywhere so what I am saying is "give up" quit struggling! Give Him your hand let Him open it and look in it let him take out of it what He wants and put in it what He wants its scary I know, because you don't know what He will take and what He will leave or what He will add but I guarantee you that it will go easier on you if you give Him everything in your hand.

I had been fighting Him for months, because I wanted what I wanted just like most of us in marriage do when its not going in a Godly Direction, but HE Will have HIS Way, HE always does. We are not our own any more we were bought with a price. He owns us now we made the choice to belong to Him and now we really have NO choice .we could go back to Egypt but we would just be slaves again.

Let GOD do what HE wants to do don't bind HIM to HIS LAWS allow HIM to have Grace and Mercy. The 23 psalm, describes it perfectly, "though I walk through the valley of the SHADOW of death". You see these kinds of deaths are only SHADOWS, the REAL THING is the green pastures on the other side and it says HE MAKES You lie down in them. His glorious light dispels the shadows and you can see them for what they really are just illusions.

So, break the box over HIM and Worship HIM have faith in GOD not in your Faith, don't be disappointed with GOD HE is just working out HIS plan in your life you just don't see the whole picture yet. When a building is being constructed at first it looks like such chaos just dust and debris everywhere we
can't see the finished building but the architect has the plans and he knows what
he is building and God knows what He is building in you and it's a "house of prayer for all nations" a temple of praise and place for his habitation it's just that right now it looks like dust and debris but He knows

I hope that my experience and testimony has and will help all who need to understand what God has a planed for our lives. Just let HIM be God and you be who God has called you to be. He knows what He is doing though it doesn't look like it to you right now, one day you will understand have faith in GOD in His faithfulness and not in your faith.

This writing was submitted to me,

By Prophetess Lorraine St. John
I was not only blessed by her trials but by the way she allowed the Lord to use her and yield to His Will. Because of her sharing and what she went thru the Lord wanted me to post her testimony for all to see who are going thru the same thing, that you may know that God does not box us in but we in fact box ourselves into things that are not of His Will. God bless you, Prophetess St. John, for allowing me to use this that others may be free. God bless you always in Jesus name

Apostle Brooks

Page layout was created by Apostle Brooks

and is the Property of C.A.B. Deliverance Ministries Inc. no portion is to be removed or copied "Thank you,"

Midi playing "Esiu"

by Bruce DeBoer

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